Started being sick about 2ish plus had pretty much cried all day so Rob finally made the decision we weren’t going. So spent my Saturday night in pyjamas with my ankles elevated. 

My wonderful best friend is looking after kids after school tomorrow so I can go to the doctors with no kids and tell them just how low I am. Trying to decide about swimming as well. The local leisure centre is undoubtedly cheaper but so restrictive with the times. Looking at a private gym with a pool which is quite pricey but is it worth it? Can’t even make a simple decision like this lately. Would love a friend to go with to motivate me and be less lonely. 

Both ankles are just as bad today, wrists and elbows are bad too. Have written a list for the doctors tomorrow. It’s a nice doctor at least. 

I know it’s impossible to get the old me back but I just want a little of the positive, cheerful me back. I don’t even like talking to people at the minute and never been like this. So am really hoping the doctor can help tomorrow cos I need something to change. 

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